The last few days have been a nightmare. My dad has been ill for a few months now and was in hospital having tests done whilst I was in hospital. The results came through on Tuesday evening and it was the worst news in the world. my dad has Non Hodgkin lymphoma ( sorry if it's spelt wrong) and started his chemo today which will last once every two weeks for six months.
Poor Joy had to explain to my dad what it was as he hadn't understood the doctor, then she rang me at 9.30pm to tell me. I nearly dropped the phone in shock and couldn't say or do anything but cry. i kept thinking about my sister and how terrible she must have felt telling my dad.
Joy sobbed down the phone and I felt useless as I wasn't there beside her comforting her. Joy and my dad are very close and this news shattered us both.
i sat for nearly three hours sobbing my heart out with Jasmine sitting on my knee, I didn't sleep well at all and then yesterday sent an e-mail to Emmie telling her what had happened. In my message I said, " emmie I can't stop the tears" I feel " lost". Emma sent me two lovely messages back which made me feel loved and wanted and the support Emma showed me then was much more than just friends. Emma and emily have made a huge difference in my life and I treasure their friendship dearly.
I'm feeling slightly better today after speaking to my Mum, she said Dad was looking brighter today and maybe he'll be home tomorrow after seeing what his blood results were.
even though I'm not as close to him as my sister is I love him so much, well after all he's my dad. So not only will I talk about myself, my cat and what goes on in my life on my blog, I'll keep people up to date with how my dad is too. I'm trying to be strong and stay positive and in time thats all I'll be but at this moment in time I'm still in shock with it all and the tears keep coming, this is a real test of my faith and at the moment my faith in the lord is rock bottom.